Funny Honey

I completely forgot while I was first dating my BT I would save all of the text messages that made me laugh or smile. For your reading pleasure here are some of the inspiring words from this man...

11.12.08

"Fabulous! I was just thinking about you. Do you have any plans this weekend?"

11.17.08

"Ah, young ladies and their vampire fantasies. It warms my cold blooded heart."

12.3.08

"They work hard to convince you that there are no good guys but I will whoop their ass with a rubber hose."

12.10.08

"I try to resist that sort of thing since I'm a grinch and all, but if anyone can melt my evil heart it's you."

12.14.08

"Thanks again for everything yesterday especially for holding my hand that was nice :)"

12.16.08

"Please don't. It would be a waste for such pretty eyes."

12.24.08

"You just move faster than me, but yes please. Let me be your boyfriend."

12.28.08

"The penis is much lower maintenance than the vagina by all accounts. That will be the first sentence in my memoirs."

1.1.09

"Happy new year! I'm so glad I met you. Lets not waste any more of the best years of our lives. I hope in 2009 we can get closer than ever to who we really are."

1.6.09

"Yeah she has a special weird power over the minds of most men. She dazzles them, gets them confused. Fortunately I am immune. Only you have that power over me."

1.20.09

"What if I rubbed the bottom of your feet with ice cubes and played Clint Eastwood  soundtracks from my ipod?"

1.28.09

"I can do those things. Run away with me! Or I will tell him all about us!"

2.7.09

"Girl I missed you at 10:00 this morning."

2.10.09

"I know. [Men] don't deserve to live. As soon as women learn to reproduce without us, we will be  rounded up, sterilized, and put to work in sweat shops."

2.11.09

"More likely you will realize you can be with someone better. You don't even know how wonderful you are."

2.20.09

"That would be even better! Two men fighting it out over your beautiful body. No girlfriend of mine gets a peaceful funeral."

4.17.09

"You look fabulous every day my dear."